Bringing Home Foster Child

Childless couples resort to countless means to produce their own child spending huge sums of money and time. Surrogate mothers though in vogue can present countless problems as they might suddenly want to retain that child creating emotions flying all over. All the other methods such as borrowed sperm could also be not quite fair for the father. All said and done it is best to adopt children rather than go in for all those complicated procedures in order that a couple can produce ones own child. There are countless children who have no parents and would be truly happy if they are adopted.

Reason
There are various situations that call for adoption of children, the most common being when couples are not able to produce their own children. Then there are those who have a single child and do not wish to have any more of their own or for some reason cannot have any more. In order that their child has a companion they go in for adoption.
Some couples long for a girl child if they have only boys and vice versa. Yet there are others despite having their own children adopt not just one but several as they simply enjoy having children around them.

Formalities for Adopting a Child
Different countries adopt different formalities before a child can be adopted. Suffice it to say however it is not an easy job to convince the authorities that the couple or sometimes an individual is capable of adopting a child and has the required infrastructure. They have to fulfill several conditions before the final permission is given to them. Sometimes it takes years before these couples or individuals can finally have their wish fulfilled.

It is no doubt a happy day for the couple or individual who finally bring home the adopted child with hopes and aspirations to bring up the child as their own. At that point in time however they do not visualize what could be in store that they would have to tackle or face to ensure happiness for the child and their own child if there is one and other members of the family who could be older parents.

Taking Care of a Foster Child
There is a tendency for the couple to bend backwards taking care that the child is not treated differently. And this is where the child tends to take advantage as the child when it is able to understand would have been told that it is adopted. It is advisable to keep the child informed of this fact as hearing it from outsiders would upset the child no end. Society plays a role too by coming to their own conclusion about how a couple treats an adopted child and this can interfere with the couple's good intentions. There is no reason why when a couple has decided to bring home a child it should give it a kind of a 'step child's' treatment. On the contrary it is the genes of the adopted child that can truly interfere with the couple's efforts to bring up the child in the best manner possible. This is a risk a couple takes and all going well they would have all their dreams fulfilled in giving that child a sound upbringing.

Getting ones own child to accept the adopted one is a Herculean task indeed. This is where the adopted child could be most miserable if it is not accepted by the child who is already there. A lot of effort would be needed here to create a conducive atmosphere both for the adopted child and the one who is in the house. It would be best however if the child in the house is told about the decision and has its full consent and in fact looks forward to having a sibling around. The couple should take extra care to see that the child in the house is not given any special privileges that the adopted child is not given. That will create disharmony among the siblings. The child in the house should be trained to react to society when this subject crops up.

A situation arises when the couple who thought were childless are blessed with one after a child is adopted and here again it might shatter the adopted child and may even imagine that it is unwanted. Assuring the adopted child and making it feel wanted is a difficult job for the couple but these situations are not uncommon.

Future Needs

As the child grows it gets the longing to meet its real parents and that again poses a problem for the couple. If there is an agreement in place that the natural parents would not in anyway make themselves available things may ease the situation somewhat. There is hope however if the adopted child is happy with its adopted parents even meeting its real parents will not drastically change the situation.

Image Credit: Family Services of Metro Orlando's photostream